Where did all the motivation go

I cannot believe that I have surpassed the half way mark on my mad white journey here in Spain. I have less than two months here in Spain and there is still so much I want to do, but sadly, with little money to do it with. I have relearned the meaning of a poor college student here, and I have also relearned the meaning of 'bring just the valuables.' I remember last spring break, I traveled with the biggest suitcase I owned plus a carry on for just one week. Drastic change from this spring break; just one little backpack, the same backpack I use for school here, for over a week.

But back to the meaning of why I'm writing this blog in the first place. I have realized that I have this lack of motivation here that I don't have in the States. I mean, I have a motivation to learn, to travel and experience new things. Obviously, everyone gets that feeling sometimes where they don't want to go to class, they're tired and would rather be doing other things. But I really think the root cause of this feeling of lack of motivation comes from this university here. Oh, Universidad Europea de Madrid, how I hate you. I perpetually never want to go to class, I loath the idea of going and it literally makes me angry. Back at home, yes there are times I don't feel like going to class, but nothing like this. In Oswego, I'm always doing something with school whether it's class (things that I'm actually interested in), clubs and organizations, meetings, work and going/helping out with programs; I'm always busy. Here I just don't have that. I'm not interested in any of my classes, and they only serve to help me learn the language better. The material is excruciatingly boring and difficult to sit through, and classes here are 2 hours long which makes it that much worse. I think it's also because I'm not taking any Psychology classes which is obviously an issue for me. Good thing that will change next semester. I was literally excited to make my schedule for fall, that's how bad it is! I'm hoping this will pass, or change, or something. I've been working out again because that usually helps, and I want a hot bod for summer, but it hasn't really so far. Maybe it's this whole laid back culture where there are no to-go cups that's sucking up my motivation. Although, I am a procrastinator at heart, and work better under pressure. Who knows.

I'm also readying this super depressing book for one of my classes called, "Half the Sky: Turning Oppression Into Opportunity for Women Worldwide." The book itself isn't well written. Two journalists,Nicholas D. Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn are the authors and it reads too much like a really long news article. Either way, the stories of the women they tell and of the horrific conditions for women in developing countries is unbelievably heart wrenching, and makes me feel like utter shit for sitting here reading about it rather than doing something about it. The book focuses on three main uplifting topics (sarcasm), Sex trafficking/rape, maternal mortality and bride burning (and other extreme domestic  violence issues). Of course, to really drive the point home, they tell of specific women's horror stories in places like Ethiopia, Africa and India.

Where did all the motivation go to help these people?